We Were Always Funny In A Car Crash Sort Of Way

the next move i never predicted.
this is catastrophic.
betrayal has been taken to new heights, and once again im left at the bottom looking up in disbelief.
just when i thought i knew what was coming, and knew how to be okay when it all blew up in my face..

it has to be her?
i gave her a chance because she was me, to the two of you.
realistically, who should have been the fourth piece to begin with.
i can grasp that, i can accept that.. but its too late now.
and i can't believe how foolish you're all being, don't you care whats best for us all?

no, no one does but me.

we're all on this rollercoaster ride together but i think im the only one getting sick.
i want off.
even though without it, how can i ever feel alive?

i saw her last night too..
the one you gave it all up for back then.
i wonder if you still think about her like i think about you.
she looks better without you.
she looks happy and free and sure.
over you.

i wished every day i could be her, and have what we both wanted.

that i could be the one who ment the whole world to you.
what was it she was, that i didn't have?

but more now than ever i was consumed with envy.
that she got to move on.
that she got all of you that i never had, and then found the strength to walk away.

i take it as just another reality check.
you really can't trust anyone.
you really don't get the fairy tale.
sometimes you kiss all the frogs and find nothing but warts on your face.
sometimes, the prince chooses a real princess and you`re left for sea foam.